Dear Ms Journal,

Sorry I haven't written lately. I've been a bit pre-occupied, what with being fired and all. You know, I've ...

Fired. Yes. Thursday afternoon. Dismissed from my job. A job I'd held and done well and faithfully for the past twenty-eight years. Unceremoniously, ignominiously, kicked to the curb.

Why? That's a jolly good question and one that deserves an answer. I wish I had one for you.

The company maintains the action was warranted based on my alleged violation of three operating rules:

Passing a signal indicating stop.

Failing in the aftermath to protect the train in the prescribed manner.

And finally, failing to protect the train as required when reversing direction to the station platform.

My story differs greatly.

From my position at the rear of the train, I was unaware we'd passed a red signal. When I inquired, I was assured we had not, in fact, passed a red signal. That renders the first two rule infractions invalid. Why would I act to protect the train when I was told it didn't need protection? We did, however, back up about fifty yards without applying a pointless rule which would only have served to further delay an already late train. The track was clear behind us. I could see it. People were waiting on the platform to board our train. Pardon me for thinking of them.

The Truth as I see it, Ms J, is this.

CN fired us - all four of us - in order to send a warning to those still working.

"Do as you're told and don't complain. We are the masters. Serve us without question. Tradition and past practice mean nothing. Collective agreements mean nothing. Your union is weak and ineffective. Bow down before us. We hold your fate in our hands. We will act as we see fit to govern this company and we require your full compliance. Submit or quit. Or be fired."

I know. It sounds pretty ominous, doesn't it? But here's the glimmer of Hope:

CN has adopted a policy lately whereby they fire people with the intention of re-instating them after they're deemed to have suffered enough. Clearly, being dismissed from a job is an emotionally crushing blow. The victim, and I use the word victim without reservation, suffers guilt and shame and fears financial ruin. Often, interpersonal relationships are threatened. Marriages are jeopardised. Credit ratings are adversely affected. After a month or so, the company decides to re-instate the hapless employee, and everything is restored to normal - seniority, pension plan, benefits, everything. They even have a term for it. Management refer to this as a "Significant Emotional Event".

This term is not known or used among employees like me. I discovered a private document some months ago that outlined this cruel policy. The paper was in a file folder and left open on a table in the lounge. I saw it and perused it quickly, thinking it was not meant for my eyes. A few minutes later, I returned to the empty room and the folder had vanished. In retrospect, I wish I had thought to take it.

I feel fairly confident that I'll get my job back. Others have suffered the same fate. They've all (nearly all) been re-instated. I don't know whether they've recouped their lost earnings or not. Quite honestly, Ms J, this is not a issue of money. Not for me, anyway. Yes, I wish I were being paid and yes, I do need the money. But for me, this is an issue of human rights. This is about justice. It's about being treated fairly and humanely with due regard for feelings and family and quality of Life.

And so as always, I'm left with choices.

I can opt to do nothing and simply wait a month or so to see if I'm re-instated. That's what others have done. Waiting, worrying and writhing in emotional agony. That's what the evil forces at CN expect us to do.

I can turn to the union and implore them to intercede on my behalf. The union, I'm sure, have lawyers who could argue my case. I have paid twelve hundred dollars a year for nearly thirty years to the union. It seems reasonable to expect a bit of assistance from them now. But sadly, the union have been nearly invisible for the past few years. My union rep was not present when I was dismissed. I haven't heard from him for more than a week. I don't feel I can expect anything from them beyond platitudes and empty promises.

Option number three is to consult a labour lawyer to determine my rights under provincial and federal labour statutes. Good lawyers are exorbitantly expensive, though. I'm told it could cost four hundred dollars for an initial consultation. Thousands of dollars and months later, I could still be out of work. The company has the twin luxuries of time and of limitless resources. I do not. They could stall litigation indefinitely until I'm bankrupt. And still jobless.

Gosh, when I put it that way, I feel so small and weak!

But those are my three choices, I think. The first is the easiest. The second one, pointless. The third option is the one that carries the greatest Hope for justice, not only for me, but for all those who might be harassed and oppressed in the months and years ahead. Unfortunately, it also holds the greatest risk. At this moment, I'm feeling angry and vindictive and leaning toward the big gamble. If I sue for wrongful dismissal, I'll also seek damages for emotional pain and suffering.

CN must be shown that they cannot continue to treat people with such callous disregard. Indeed, I believe that the future success of the company depends upon it. A successful company depends greatly on a workforce that is motivated not by fear, but by happy hearts desiring to do a good job. This is not a new concept, Ms Journal. I really don't know why the Yanks have missed it.

But that's how I'm feeling right now. Tonight, I could feel frightened again and be seized by paralysis. It's been a real rollercoaster, Ms J. And the ride has only just begun.

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