At the Hospital in Milton, Ontario ...

... a teenage girl is awaiting the birth of her child. Dan's child. My grandchild.

The phone rang at 1:30 this morning and woke me from a sound sleep. I answered it to hear a frantic Kelly announcing that Maxine was in labour and they were off to the hospital to have her baby.

"Can you call Meagan? She's at home, worried sick."

So I got up and thumped down the stairs in my underpants to find the phone number and call my girl. Of course, she was still awake and sounding quite at peace.

"I'm fine, Dad. Mum's the one who's freakin' out. She's scaring Dan and Maxine. They've gone to the hospital. The one in Milton, I think. Really, Dad. I'm fine. Go back to bed. I'll call you as soon as I hear anything, OK?"

"K, Scout," I told her. "Thanks."

And I went back to sleep.

It's 3:30 in the afternoon now and Kelly just called. She's still at the hospital. Still waiting. Good. I hope she waits there all day.

"How's Dan?" I asked.

"Fine. Getting impatient and complaining of being tired. But otherwise, fine."

"What about Maxine?"

"She's doing really well. She's still frozen from the epidural. I told them to turn it off. I told them she wouldn't be able to push if she was frozen down there. It was a meconium birth, eh? Like Meagan. I was disappointed 'cuz I couldn't do my doula thing, eh? I told them they should ..."

And so on, Ms J. Blah, blah, stupid-woman-blah. Whatever. I can't believe I actually had to listen to her. It's too bad she called. I had specifically asked Dan to call me when the baby was born. I don't want to hear Kelly's voice.

"So are you coming to the hospital this aft'? The baby will be here in a few hours. Prob'ly less."

I told her I'd pop round to see the baby tomorrow. Tomorrow afternoon.

"Why? Do you have to work today?"

Yeah. Yeah, that's right. Work. I have to go to work. I was a bit surprised really. She seemed OK with that. I thought she'd try to guilt me into driving out there now.

"Please ask Dan to call as soon as the baby is born, Kelly," I told her. "Let me know that everything's OK."

I have a date with Jacqueline. We're meeting first for dinner then going to see a play. The baby can wait until tomorrow.

Am I a selfish Grandad, Ms J? Grandad. GRANDAD?

HOLY SHIT, MS JOURNAL! I'M A GRANDAD!!

Nearly.

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