Love: The Gift That's Best When Returned

I got an email from a friend the other day. Frankie. I call her Frankie, Ms Journal. Her name is Frances. And she's beautiful. In her letter, she told me she'd recently lost her grandmother. Attached to the missive, was the eulogy Frankie had written and delivered at her grandma's funeral.

I am attaching the eulogy I wrote and said at my grandmother's funeral. I want the people I care about to hear it and live it. That way my grandmother's love continues on and is spread throughout the world.

Love Frankie

I was moved by its simple message.

"Would you mind if I posted it on my blog?" I asked her.

"I would love it if you put it on your blog," she said, "especially during this Christmas season. I have learned from my Grandma that at the end of your life, you won't remember the toys, the money, the food that was given at Christmas, but you will remember the love. Love is the true meaning of Christmas. The more we remember that, the better our world will be."

See what I mean, Ms J? Isn't she beautiful?

So here it is, the essense of Christmas - expressed simply and honestly, and offered at, of all places, a funeral.

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December 17, 2005.

My grandmother lived a great life during her 96 years on the planet. She had many reasons to be proud. Some of them are sitting and standing before you today. Her 5 children, 10 grandchildren, two great grandchildren, and a marriage to my grandfather that lasted 57 years. My grandmother could be described as strong, independent, and most importantly, loving.

I have many memories of her. I would spend a week at her house during my summer vacation when I was a child. I remember her beautiful garden, her tasty raspberry jam on toast in the morning, and the joking that went on at the table between her and my grandfather.

However, the most important memory happened recently. In June of this year I celebrated my birthday with good food, delicious cake, and surrounded by family. That afternoon I went to visit Granny. She looked me in the eyes and said, “I love you.” I replied, “I know. I love you too.” And she said, “I want you to know I really mean it. I’m not just saying it. It is coming from a special place. It comes right from my heart.”

I don’t know if my grandmother knew she had given me the greatest gift I could have received that day. No matter what happened, where I went, or what I did, I knew I was loved.

And so this Christmas I will not be mourning my grandmother’s death. Her body may be gone but her love remains with me and with us all. Love is eternal. And because it lasts forever, not even death can take it away from us.

To honour my grandmother I am asking each of you here to do one thing today. Look someone in the eyes and tell them you love them and truly mean it. It is the greatest gift to give and to receive.

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Merry Christmas, Ms Journal. God Bless us, every one!

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