All Quiet on the Mimico Front

Peaceful, Ms Journal. I feel at peace tonight. Quiet. Sattvic, I think, is the right word. I've had a nice dinner and a hot bath by candle light. That never fails to help me fall still.

We had a wonderful show in Oakville last night. In the change room before the performance, there was a noticeable lack of conversation. It's often that way on closing night. We had a good run but now it's all come to an end. There was no jocular banter or good-natured teasing. Everyone, it seems, was lost in thought. As I've said before, it's a feeling I can only describe as bittersweet.

The cast party afterward at the home of the director was fabulous. I didn't get home til after 3:00. There was lots of food and drink, and lots of hugs and handshakes. God, I'll miss those people, Ms J. I miss them already. It's the Truth that I always feel blue for a few days following the closing of a play.

"What will you do next?" was the oft-heard question at the party. "Do you have another play lined up? Will you audition again soon?"

I told them all no. I want to spend some time with my Meagan. I've really been neglecting her these past few weeks. She phoned me up the other day.

"Are you coming to get me on Friday, Dad?"

I felt like a shit, Ms J, but I told her no.

"I have a show to do on Friday night, Scout. And Saturday. There's a cast party on Saturday, too. I really want to go. And I'm meeting a woman after church on Sunday."

"A woman, eh Dad? What is she, like a date?"

Meagan tried to sound interested, but I know she was disappointed.

"No, Scout. It's not a date. I'm just meeting her, that's all."

"OK. Well, what about next weekend, then?"

I told her the play was closing on Saturday and then I'd be free. Next weekend would be fine.

"Why don't you bring a friend with you, Meagan? You always talk about your friends, but I've never met any of them."

"Really?" she said.

"Yeah. Really."

"Can I bring Sarah?"

"Honey, you can bring anyone you want."

I think it's a good idea to meet some of my daughter's friends, Ms J. See who she associates with. Get to know them.

"Cool! I'll ask Sarah."

I phoned Meagan this afternoon to tell her how my "date" went.

"Any kissing, Dad? Hand-holding? Anything like that?"

"No, Scout. We had lunch together at the Canadiana. That's all."

"Is she ugly as a hairy ape?"

"No. She's not."

"Is she painfully beautiful?"

I sighed, Ms J. And shook my head at my daughter's silliness.

"She's cute enough, I guess."

I have to be careful here, Ms Journal. She reads this blog.

"I'll come get you next weekend for sure, Scout," I said, changing the topic. "Make sure you talk to Sarah, and get her mum's permission. Maybe we can see a movie together. Or go downtown, or to a mall or something."

She was obviously pleased.

"Sweet."

"Where's Dan today? Is he home?"

"Yup. I'll get him. Wanna talk to him?"

"Yes, Meagan. Please. That'd be good."

"DAAAAAAAAANNNNNNNNNNNN!!! DAD'S ON THE PHONE!! HE WANTS TO TALK TO YOU!!"

I had a nice chat with The Boy. He's still working at the drugstore. Still angry about his hours being reduced. Still struggling to pay his mother $500. a month for room and board.

"She said she'd like to charge me less, Dad, but Maxine's here and Mum has to feed her too. I can't pay her the full amount. It's too much. I don't have anything left for myself."

Mmm-hmm. Welcome to reality, Boy.

"I'm gonna give it another month," he told me. "If I don't get more hours by then, I'm gonna quit."

I suggested he find another job before he quits the drugstore.

"And give them at least two weeks notice, Dan. That's the right way to quit a job."

I asked him about Maxine then.

"How's Maxine doing? Is she still healthy? Is the baby moving?"

Kelly was calling him and Meagan to the dinner table and Dan excused himself.

"Yeah. It's all good. She went to the doctor last week and got some pre-natal vitamins. She takes them every day. They're as big as horse pills."

Kelly was yelling in the background, getting more insistant that they come to the table.

"I gotta go, Dad. I'll talk to you soon, OK?"

"I love you, Dan."

"I love you too. And I always will."

"Bye, son."

"Bye, Dad."

I held the phone in my hand and smiled for a minute after I'd hung up. I pictured my kids at the dinner table and wished for a moment that I could be with them. Eating, laughing, sharing stories.

It's been a good day, Ms Journal. A good day. Tomorrow at 11:00, I have an appointment to see Meagan's teacher. My girl hasn't been doing well in her new school and I want to help get her back on track.

I think I'll go to bed early. Night, Ms J.

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